My PCOS Story

Looking back I guess my troubles started not so much when I entered into puberty, as it is for some, but once I became sexually active. My periods were always pretty normal (not exactly to the date but fairly close) but this began to change when I became sexually active. I noticed that every time my boyfriend and I had sex that I would miss my period. Of course this meant we had a "pregnancy" scare every time and eventually we stopped having sex altogether because it became more of a source of stress than anything else. So, no sex meant, essentially, no more problems. So I never concerned myself with the fact that something might be wrong with me. That is, until later.

After marriage I stopped my birth control almost immediately because my husband and I decided that we wanted to start our family right away. Since I was now having sex again, my period skipping started up again. This time, I was hoping for pregnancy so every negative test was such a disappointment. This went on for about 2 1/2 years before I finally decided to seek out medical assistance. At first they couldn't give me a reason as to why we weren't pregnant yet. My husband was in the Marine Corp and was gone a lot, so we thought maybe we just weren't hitting my ovulation period just right and that was the reason for the non-pregnancy but they could give me no explanation as to why I was missing periods. Then, shortly after my husband left on his 2nd deployment I started getting some other pregnancy symptoms along with my missed period. I felt so tired, I was gaining just a slight amount of weight, and I was feeling almost a constant state of nauseousness.  I took an over-the-counter pregnancy test which again came up negative but couldn't seem to figure out what was causing these other symptoms. I headed to the doctor, took an "official" test and then headed home to wait for the call. When the call finally came it was NOT what I wanted to hear. The test came back negative, I wasn't pregnant. I immediately called in to make an appointment to find out what was causing my symptoms. The doctor took some blood, ran some test but still couldn't give me an answer. The best idea she could come up with was that I must be having a chemical pregnancy. She gave me a brief explanation and said "if it happens again, come back." I was flabbergasted, you’re not even sure that this is what happened to me and you’re just going to say, come back if it happens again. I was beyond frustrated.

At this point I decided to see another doctor, any doctor that would listen and actually attempt to find out what my problem was. My appointment with my new doctor was upon me and I was nervous to see him because I just wanted answers. He listened to me; he took notes, and then explained that he believed he had a diagnosis. He believed I had PCOS or Poly Cystic Ovary Syndrome. I seem to have most of the symptoms and it would explain a lot of what had happened over the last several years. So he set me up with a prescription of Metformin and told me to let him know if I had any problems. I was elated, scared and relieved all at once. I had an answer but what did this mean for me. I went home and started researching PCOS as much as I could and getting as much information as possible. I learned that I had symptoms that I didn't even know were most likely caused by PCOS.

I took my prescription regularly, exercised the extra weight off I had gained, and anxiously awaited my husband’s return home. I believe it was about 3 months after I started Metformin when we FINALLY had that so awaited homecoming. Whether it was that night, or any of the consecutive following nights we found out we were pregnant with our first a mere 3 1/2 weeks after his return. I/we couldn't believe it. The dream we had waited so long for and tried so hard to achieve was finally coming true.

My pregnancy was flawless. I gained just the right amount of weight, baby was healthy, and growing right on schedule. My labor experience was not the best but had nothing (that I know of ) to do with my PCOS. After, things seemed to be going well and it looked like my problems were behind me. I had my baby girl and the symptoms I had been having were so minimal that I didn't care about them anymore. That was, until about 2 months later.

After I gave birth to my daughter I was about 15 lbs or so within reach of my pre-pregnancy weight. I thought that I would lose it with a little hard work and it would be no big deal. WRONG! This is where my PCOS really reared it's ugly head. Not only did I not lose those 15 lbs, I gained an additional 45 more lbs. My symptoms that I had previously, really seemed out of control now. The weight gain, depression, mood swings, and hirsutism was now noticeable to not only myself but to others around me.

I have been back to the doctor since the onset of these horrible symptoms and I was put back on Metformin. This time it has helped some with subsiding the symptoms I have, but not much. So I am still suffering from these things on a daily basis. It is so hard on my self-esteem because the girl I see in my head looks like this:

However, the girl that looks back at me in the mirror, looks like this:

Although I have come to a point where I am ok with myself (I don't love myself but I can stand myself) I realize that I need to lose weight for many reasons, not just because I'm not skinny. My PCOS is better controlled when I am at a healthy weight. I am also less likely to develop the life threatening symptoms of PCOS like High blood pressure, Type 2 Diabetes, or Heart disease.

So this is my story thus far at least as it relates to PCOS. We shall see what the days, weeks, months, and years have to offer me as I work my way through this journey.

God Bless!